I've heard of this ...

I've heard of this "Y". Rumour has it that she can go very wild and cause chaos once even a whiff of red wine passes under her nostrils. Be careful.

Happy Friday ...

Happy Friday! I hope Santy brung you something nice. Are you going up X's house anytime his Mammy lets him out to play? There'll be no stupid girls there.

Xmas?

Merry .. y'know, I've completely forgotten what it is we're supposed to be celebrating. Is it Mick Jagger's birthday? Well, let's wish him many more.

I don't know ...

I don't know - with my fresh, young features I can't get served in a pub.

Talking to girls ...

Talking to girls is out now. It's all about mullets and looking moody to a shit soundtrack - in other words, the country's just like you left it.